Why my bank has hired people to make “courtesy calls” to customers — which seem to be thinly disguised ways to sell other products/services — but cannot tell me that they have discontinued my paper statements?

I have no problem getting my statement online, but I suddenly realized that I hadn’t seen a paper statement for months without seeing confirmation that it would no longer be mailed to me. Online, I see that I have the option of choosing one paper statement free, and any others will cost me. I have three accounts, and I only want one statement anyway; the free version is not applied to this one. Who did it? The bank’s not saying. This is the bank, by the way, that hired people to call and ask me if I thought the bank “cared” about  me.

Why a department store hid a similar statement fee notice in a densely worded document from a financial company?

When I first saw the notice, I almost threw it out as  junk mail, because I didn’t recognize the financial institution, and there was no obvious mention of the store or its logo. Inside, point #15 revealed that a $1 processing fee would be charged for each paper statement, but you could instead register for online access and get an e-statement.

As I say, I have no problem with online statements, or charging a fee to get one mailed. I do have a problem with companies not making change obvious to customers. Don’t you?

Read up on grammar myths, send an e-card, have fun with grammar and more with Grammar Girl Mignon Fogarty here.

And be sure to go forth and write well!

Patriotic feelings. Canadians are normally shy about this, at least compared to Americans, but put us in the Olympics, especially on home turf, and watch out for the flags, red & white clothing, Canadian flag tattoos and spontaneous outbursts of our national anthem. Come to think of it, it’s kind of like the Canadian hospitality suite at the IABC World Conferences.

The feeling of goodwill that seemed to permeate the games. Well, until it came down to the big Canada vs. USA hockey game, when it was all GO CANADA on our part. (Thank you, Team Canada and Sidney Crosby, for letting Canada win gold and USA silver 3-2 in overtime. We may have lots of Americans on our Canadian teams, but we consider it Our Game.)

The unusual medals, a collaboration between artist Corrine Hunt and designer Omer Arbel. Each medal is unique; find out how here.

The crazy sports like ski cross that have athletes flinging themselves down steep slopes and runs with seemingly reckless abandon, although I know it’s only hard training that makes it look easy. And the snowboard races! And wild ski tricks!

CTV ran a great series called “How tough are these sports?” In it, various athletes tried a different sport than usual to see just how difficult it really was. So figure skaters Jamie Sale and David Pelletier discovered working with speed skater Denny Morrison that the skates and the method used for speed skating are quite different. Ditto for hockey player Georges Laraque, who had fun with short track skater Olivier Jean learning that racing isn’t as easy as it looks, and hockey player Wendel Clark, who strapped himself in to play  sledge hockey with the Canadian Sledge Hockey team.

CTV ran another great series called “Difference Makers,” hosted by Rick Hansen, himself a difference maker. Hansen is the “Man in Motion” who pushed his wheelchair through 34 countries in 1985, raising funds for spinal cord injury research and awareness of the potential of people with disabilities. The series pays tribute to the extraordinary people who have helped Canada’s Olympians and Paralympians overcome their personal and athletic challenges.

Norway’s men’s curling team and their crazy pants. I didn’t exactly love the pants themselves, originally made famous by golfer John Daly, but I sure did appreciate the sense of humour the team had wearing them.

Here are some of the things that don’t get a medal:

The use of “medal” as a verb, as in, “She’s expected to medal in this sport.” I think I also heard “to podium” as a verb. Ughhhh.

How it so often seems to be all about winning gold, and seldom is a silver or bronze medal won; instead, it’s “settled for.” I think any medal is a real achievement, especially when you look at timed sports where athletes set personal records and finish mere fractions of a second apart.

The “I believe in the power of you and I”  in the stirring song, I Believe, sung by 16-year-old Nikki Yanofsky. Grammatically speaking (word nerd alert!), it should be “you and me,” since “of” is a preposition and takes an object, as pointed out by grammarian Joanne Buckley.

CTV’s official Olympic coverage site, which wanted to make me “upgrade my browser with the latest version of Microsoft Silverlight” to watch the Canadian gold medal performance of ice dancing, and any other videos on the site.

What did you like or not like about the Olympics?

The shortlist of books (hilarious itself for the content descriptions) vying for the latest Diagram Prize for Oddest Book Title of the Year was just announced last week. The contestants are:

• The Changing World of Inflammatory Bowel Disease by Ellen Scherl and Marla Dubinsky (who made it to third place last year with Curbside Consultation of the Colon)
• Collectible Spoons of the 3rd Reich by James A. Yannes
• Crocheting Adventures with Hyperbolic Planes by Daina Taimina
• Governing Lethal Behavior in Autonomous Robots by Ronald C. Arkin
• What Kind of Bean is this Chihuahua? by Tara Jansen-Meyer
• Afterthoughts of a Worm Hunter by David Crompton.

Horace Bent, custodian of the prestigious prize, says he received a record number of entries this year, many via Twitter (find him at @HoraceBent). I don’t find the entries are nearly as funny as in previous years, but maybe that’s just me.

Vote for your favourite title (scroll down to the poll on the left side), and watch for news of the winning title on Friday, March 26.

If you’re looking for beach weather, Florida might or might not have it in February. We happened to hit a week of temperatures in the mid-70s, which was certainly warmer than home (and no snow!) but not warm enough to sit on a beach except fully dressed. We Canadians were obvious; we were the ones wearing shorts while the locals had long pants and coats.

Bring your own snacks and headphones. Oh, the airlines are happy to sell you both, but who really wants a $6 sandwich and cheap $3 headphones? You can still get free coffee or a Coke, though. For now.

Be prepared to pay to see a movie. You might expect Air Canada to have been the first to figure out this new way to make money (and I’m sure they’ll be all over it soon), but it was WestJet. I read a book instead.

You really don’t want to travel anywhere with more than a carry-on bag. Going, we  were in line a full hour just to check our bags, after already checking in online. Customs and security took another hour. Coming home, we waited 50 minutes for our bags to arrive, and only one out of three made it. The other two were delivered two days later. We’re grateful this didn’t happen on the front end.

Try to stem the e-mail tide. Before leaving, I went to all the lists I follow and changed my delivery frequency to once a week instead of once a day. I added a vacation notice to a client e-mail account and recorded voice mail that made it clear I wasn’t in the office all week. Still, I came home to more than 200 messages from five working days away.

Be merciless. Because I had 200+ messages to wade through, I did a lot of skimming and deleting, particularly those list digests.

Getting away for a break is well worth it. Just having no particular responsibilities (like a 6:30 a.m. wake-up call to walk the dog, or figuring out what to make for dinner) is a pleasure.

I’m back to reality now, complete with early morning dog-walking, which I actually missed. (The walking part, not necessarily the early start.)

I had made a donation to the Canadian Red Cross in support of their earthquake relief efforts in Haiti, and today they sent an e-mail saying, “Thank you. Your generosity is making a difference in Haiti.”

But they didn’t leave it at that.

• They listed some of the ways donations have supported their efforts, in sending over 2,600 metric tonnes of relief items; distributing one million litres of water to 200,000 people each day; and providing medical care to more than 9,600 people so far.
• They linked to  “photos of your support in action” at the Canadian Red Cross Flickr page, where you can see people carrying boxes, distributing supplies, performing surgery, draping people in blankets, comforting children.
• They noted that in addition to helping now, the Red Cross is analyzing how to rebuild the nation and make it stronger, healthier and more resilient.
• A final note includes ways to encourage others to give by setting up a personalized fundraising page, and there are links to forward the note to a friend, visit the home page for Haiti relief or follow the Red Cross on Twitter and Facebook.

This information is also found on their web site, but they didn’t wait for me to go there and find it; they made sure I saw it.

Nicely done.

Looks like February is following the frantic pace of January when it comes to networking. Tonight I’m out with a communicator I am mentoring, plus another IABC colleague. Tomorrow and Monday, I’m having lunch with friends. And I am signed up for these events:

February 10, 6:30 - 9 p.m.
HPCA presents: Encore Improv
Peel Village golf course, 29A Hartford Trail, Brampton, ON
Whether you are negotiating, meeting with a client for the first time or fielding questions, being quick on your feet is an essential business skill for independent communicators. Learn from the Second City style of improv comedy how to respond in the moment, spark your creativity and sharpen your listening skills. Free to Halton-Peel Communications Association members; $20 for non-members. Sign up at www.hpcaonline.com. (Note: If there is still small print that says the event is closed, ignore it; it’s not. Register with Mary Harvey.)

Feb. 11, 6-8:30 p.m
IABC/AIP presents: Show Your Love for the Planet
Haworth Toronto Showroom, 55 University Avenue, Toronto, ON
IABC and its Alliance of Independent Practitioners offer a “sustainable” munch & mingle. Learn about sustainable approaches to communications while you network. Participate in a “green footprint” icebreaker and have a chance to win eco-friendly door prizes. IABC members pay $30, non-members $40. Register online.

Feb. 23, 6:30-8 p.m.
IABC/Toronto Westend networking event
Wendel Clark’s Classic Grill & Sports Lounge, Oakville, ON
Strictly networking fun for $25. Register by e-mail.

Feb. 25, 6-8 p.m.
IABC presents: Successful Communications in a 2.0 World with Steve Crescenzo
Sutton Place Hotel, 955 Bay Street, Toronto, ON
Steve Crescenzo is one of the U.S.’s leading experts in employee communications. He comes equipped with dozens of case studies and best practices in Creative Communications from both small and large organizations in Canada and the U.S. He’ll show you how to use multimedia tools such as podcasts and video without blowing the budget, and five things you can do to turn intranets and websites from electronic wastelands to powerhouse communication tools.  IABC members $45, non-members $65. Register online.

How is your networking going so far this year? Are you getting out there?

Okay, so spinmasters will say Dr. P. was “outsourcing” the work because he was so busy working. Oh, please.

I say he should be able to spare 10 minutes to duck into the drugstore and buy a few simple things, showing that he pays attention: knowing/buying the cosmetics his wife uses, the chocolate she likes, the perfume she’s been wanting…you get the picture. His wife has a right to expect something from him and it’s just not the same if someone else does it.

At a networking event the other night, we were talking about entrepreneurs who use “& Associates” with their name. Someone wondered if it’s ethical if the contract says “I will do X” but then we subcontract the work so someone else actually does X.

The answer, of course, is “it depends.”

Is the client “buying” you and you alone, or just a product or service? Is the client the kind of wife who wants her husband to pick out a personal, meaningful gift, or the kind of wife who just wants an expensive gift?

Sometimes the client truly wants you; for instance, you’ve made a name for yourself in your flare for media relations, or your ability to put someone at ease and get a great interview. If you’ve promised that you will be the one doing this, the client is buying YOU.

But sometimes the client just wants the work done. Your firm has the reputation for getting things done, and the client is happy to hire you, knowing you’ll look after everything. So if you write a media release but you subcontract media calls to someone else, that may be fine. In that case, though, you should make it clear — specifying in your contract or letter of agreement — that you occasionally work with others and “we” will handle X. And you certainly should review your subcontractor’s work and make sure it meets your standards.

Do you agree?

Does that seem like excellent customer service, to make a change that could possibly result in customers not being able to use the service they have paid for?

Bell has helpfully provided an “Internet Check-up” tool to see if any updating is needed. Oh, but too bad for me, it’s “currently only compatible with Windows.” As the Bell site curtly informed me, “You are running a Macintosh operating system.” Not to worry, though; “Efforts are ongoing to provide a Macintosh compatible version as soon as possible.”

Bell has been tinkering with their system for a few months now, causing random unexplained grief. First, the mail system stopping playing nice with the e-mail program I use. Then, I discovered that I had somehow been given a limit on how many messages I could send in 24 hours, without being told I had a limit. So although I administer a mailing list of about 230 association members and have been regularly sending messages to them for about two years, I suddenly got an error message that said, “Requested action aborted. You have reached the limit for how many messages you can send in 24 hours.”

I tried to e-mail Bell’s support account to find out what was going on, but of course I was over my secret limit. So I tried online chat and found out my limit was 250 e-mail messages a day. When I explained my problem and asked that my limit be raised to accommodate the mailing list I administer, here’s what happened:

Bell: I would need to escalate the issue to a higher tech support to get this issue resolved.

Me: Please do so.

Bell: I suggest you wait for 24 hours for the limit to be raised.

Me: You mean I can’t e-mail anyone else today?

Bell: Sorry to say a yes.

Me: That’s not very responsive service. I can certainly wait 24 hours to send a bulk e-mail but another 10 to 15 today doesn’t seem like much to arrange.

Bell: I do understand your concerns but we need to wait.

Well, the limit has been raised, although I didn’t get official notice of it and have no idea what it is. All I know is that I’ve been able to send several bulk mailings to the group. But you see why I am a little worried about the changes happening January 31.

So if you are a company upgrading your systems, please make sure it’s a change that will actually improve customer service. Otherwise, you are just like the companies who advise they are “changing” their fees when really they mean “increasing your fees” — it’s not good news to the customer.

As has happened, sadly, to many a print publication, this one no longer exists. It was a controversial decision that I won’t get into here. Suffice to say a number of us mourned and still feel its loss, despite its eventual replacement with an electronic version.

As I flipped through the issues, enjoying the smooth touch of the paper and the simple, clean design (by one of the group’s talented graphic designers), I was pleased to see that the content stood the test of time. We have a number of talented writers in the group who contributed, and it showed. The newsletter covered a variety of useful tips for things like riding out the peaks and valleys of solo work, cold calling, dealing with “scope creep” and maintaining a professional business with children home during the summer. The newsletter introduced new members and shared updates on projects in which existing members were involved. If you couldn’t make it to one of the regular meetings, you knew you’d be able to read about it in a summary that was the next best thing to being there.

Don’t get me wrong; e-newsletters can be great, and I subscribe to quite a few. The best make sure the content is king, with useful guidance on whatever the newsletter topic happens to be. And they are regular; if the newsletter is monthly, you get one every month. Although many people think an e-newsletter has to be flashy, a strictly text newsletter is fine; looks aren’t that important if the content is there.

But what’s so great about print?

• It’s portable. Employees can read it on the bus or subway, and take it home to share with their families.
• It’s easy to keep. You can file it and refer to it later, as our independent communicators often told me they did.
• It’s easier on the eyes than staring at a computer screen.
• It can be more economical than something employees read online, since many times they will print it out at work anyway, at higher expense than the bulk printing of hard copies.
• Not everyone has a computer. I know, it seems like we all do, but what about truck drivers? People who work in a mine or in construction? They may have shared access to a computer at certain times, or are connected by a BlackBerry or other mobile device that isn’t the best place to view an online newsletter.

Respected communications expert Dr. TJ Larkin notes that “The Web is best for short, quick, information retrieval. The Web user is a hunter: leaning forward, senses pricked, visually aware, searching and eventually tracking down the targeted information. This is a great mental state for searching but a much poorer one for comprehending.”

Dr. Larkin says companies should “think paper” when communicating things like a major change to benefit plans, a big strategic change in business direction or a new software application. “Messages that are new, long, and complicated belong on paper, not on Web pages,” he says. “Paper’s strength is comprehension. People use the Web — they read paper.”

(Download Dr. Larkin’s free report, Communicating Big Change Using Small Communication, at www.larkin.biz > Publications.)